A few pics from our getaway . . .

Create Your Own!

14 months!?!?!

Yikes - I totally missed our LID anniversary yesterday. As of yesterday, November 7, we have officially been logged in at the CCAA for 14 months. I can't believe that - and I can't believe I missed it. I am so focused on the end of the month, the present is all a blur!

So congrats to us - hopefully we don't have to celebrate another one.

Thanks for the reminder Doris! :)

Hooray CCAA!

We came back from Quebec to some good news:

"The CCAA has finished the placement of children for the families whose adoption application documents were registered with our office before August 25, 2005"

So that was 16 days worth of files. That's great news. Now they only have to match 13 days in November and we're in! Can you believe that in less than a month, we will probably be seeing our little one's face for the very first time? It's been such a long, long journey so far that I have a hard time believing it's so close.

Anyway, we'll keep you posted as we hear any tidbit of news - especially when the stork is on its way. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers - this may be the longest month yet! :)

Here are the monthly pics of the kids crossing off the days on the countdown calendar. We're so close!

The Bear and the Princess

Here are our cutie patooties all dressed up for Halloween last week.

Aren't they cute??

We're Baaaack!

Ok, the reason I haven't posted on here for a while is because we were in Quebec City. And by "we", I mean Mike and I. We had an awesome time!! Mike actually had to go there for work and I got to tag along this time. Even though he had a lot to do, we actually got to spend quite a bit of time together. We left last week Wednesday morning and came back late this afternoon. I feel very relaxed, refreshed and rejuvinated. It was a much needed break and I'm sure the last getaway we'll get to enjoy for a long time. (well until China anyway . . . and I'm not sure how much of a vacation that will be!)

By the way, the kids also had a great time. Grandma Carmody came to stay at our house with them and they had so much fun. Thanks Peggy for helping to make this getaway so relaxing. We knew the kids were in good hands and didn't worry one bit about their well-being. Good practice for China eh?

So needless to say, I have a lot of catching up to do. Stay posted . . .

Why the suspense???

Where are those October referrals? What's taking so long??

So Mike was out getting groceries a few weeks ago and this is always kind of a dangerous thing. You never know what he'll come home with . . . usually something for the kids (although I have to say that sometimes it's flowers for me too). Anyway, this particular day he came home with a Dora movie. My kids love Dora (and Diego) so this was perfect. It's called Dora's World Adventures and the very last place she goes is China. It's so cute. I've noticed some of my adoption friends are starting to talk about this movie too.

Here's the plot: "Dora and her friends are ready to celebrate friendship day when they realize all of the friendship bracelets are missing. Swiper has swiped them from all of the friendship parades around the world, and the bracelets won't "glow" unless everyone around the world has them. Dora volunteers to help Swiper travel to China, France, Tanzania and Russia to retrieve the bracelets and save the day! "

And speaking of movies, another great one is "Big Bird in China". Here's what one website says about it:

"Big Bird and his Sesame Street companion, Barkley, the big, fluffy dog, travel across China in search of the legendary Feng Huang, the Phoenix Bird. Along the way they visit with Chinese schoolchildren, watch a Tai Ji demonstration, learn some Chinese words and songs, and meet the mischievous Monkey King."

We got this one for the kids last year for Christmas and would highly recommend it. The kids have learned so much about China and Chinese culture from it.

Quilt Update

I finally found someone to make the quilt for me. It's such a big job and I totally appreciate this person's willingness to complete it for me. What a huge relief! Here are a few pictures of the new seamstress.

You've got mail!

I know it's not really a huge deal, but I was very, very excited today to receive our "Referral Booklet" and "Adoption Travel Guide" from our agency. Basically this guide just goes over what to expect when we receive our referral and lists the things we need to do such as signing forms, filling out Visa applications, making travel arrangements, etc.





It doesn't really mean anything except that we're getting closer. I ripped open the envelope and started reading and reading and reading. Boy does it feel real now! I know it could still be a few months away but considering how long we've been waiting . . . it's just around the corner!!! Hooray - bring on those referrals CCAA!

Unfinished projects . . . .

. . . . finished! The last time my mother-in-law was over, she kicked my butt into gear (in a good way) and strongly encouraged me to get some unfinished knitting projects done. So here I am showing them off.







I'm proud of myself for actually finishing them and they actually look half decent. The only problem is, they may look kinda funny if we do end up with a referral for a boy!! I think I may have to knit some blue sweaters just in case. Well, actually I have some more unfinished projects I need to work on first . . . such as the quilt! I really, really need to work on that one. It's hanging over my head and it will feel so good to finally get it done. Perhaps I'll post some pictures of my progress so far.

So thanks for the encouragement Peggy (and for sewing the green one together for me!) Feel like doing some quilting???

Dream

Ok all you dream interpreters, listen up. I had a dream last night that we got our referral (and the baby actually came along with the referral. Ha!) And . . . it was a boy!!!

When I was pregnant with our daughter, I had a few dreams about the baby and every time it was a girl. I still thought we were having a boy. Then when I was pregnant with our son, I dreamt that we were having a boy but I still thought we were having a girl. I was wrong both times. Now I assume we're having a girl - obviously because most of the babies from China are girls . . . but am I wrong again?? Wouldn't it be a shock if we got a boy?

I suppose I need to work a little harder on preparing Victoria for the fact that she may have another little brother and not a sister. She really, really wants the baby to be a girl and we've told her that there is a chance it could be a boy. Hopefully she'll be happy just having a baby around here again, whether it's a boy or a girl.

By the way, Mike and I will be overjoyed with either a boy or a girl - that's why we didn't specify gender on our homestudy. Hopefully we'll find out soon!

Happy Birthday!

Happy birthday to the greatest husband and father in the whole world. Have a great day. We love you lots!

(I tried to make a video of pictures of this greatest husband and father but it wouldn't work for some reason).

Waiting for Referral Syndrome

I found this article on the Christian Adoption Moms website and thought it was worth sharing. For those of you on the same journey as us, you can probably totally relate to this "syndrome" and for those of you who are following our journey, you will be able to see what we're going through as we wait . . . and wait . . . . and wait . . . (Note: comments in red are mine)

Waiting-for-Referral-Syndrome
copyright 2005, Edi Sowers

"Why is it that as we get closer to referral, each day gets longer and longer?”

Picture this scenario.

Your Dossier has been sent. You’ve received notice that it’s been logged in at the country’s adoption office. You begin your wait.

At first, there is a letdown. You’ve been so caught up in the paperchase 24/7 that you now feel a sense of purposelessness. (yep, I can totally related to that one) What to do with all that free time?

Next, you start communicating with your online adoption groups. You have 6, maybe 7 months to wait before any real chance of receiving your referral. (ok, obviously this was written last year as we all know wait times are a lot longer!) The days come, the days go. You develop a routine with your work and family and the wait seems bearable.

Six months later, (again, a lot longer now!) you are chained to the computer with your phone strapped to your hip. All you can think about is – “When will the call come?” You can’t function at the office. You spend valuable productive hours chatting online with other waiting parents. The days now seem to have 48 hours instead of 24, and they drag on from one to the next.

All you adoptive parents out there know what I’m talking about. It’s the oh-so-common “waiting-for-referral” syndrome where the closer you get to your referral, the longer each day becomes.

We all experience some form of WFRS at some point. What is important is how often and how severe it is.

Mild “Waiting-for-Referral Syndrome”

In many people, the symptoms come and go. They have waves of obsession that come over them every few days or so.

You find yourself counting on your fingers the number of months, weeks, or days until your referral should come.

The calendar pages are becoming frayed because you keep flipping forward to the anticipated “referral" time, daydreaming about what day it will arrive. (that's why we all need a "carmody calendar" as Dawn calls it!)

What to do:

Relax and remember that the feelings will soon pass. Hundreds – no, thousands of parents have gone through this before. If they can do it, so can you.

Think of a useful project related to your soon-to-be child: paint a piece of furniture for their room, knit a cap, start an adoption lifebook – some activity that will allow you to think about your child during the time you are focusing on the project without becoming obsessed with it. (so perhaps I should finish off all those unfinished projects I started for our little one but don't feel motivated to do anymore??)

Moderate “Waiting-for-Referral Syndrome”

The next stage of WFRS is commonly identified by increasing anxiety and focus on the length of the remaining wait.

You may begin to have dreadful thoughts about the possible conditions in which your soon-to-be child is living.

You have the child’s room furnished, arranged, and all the clothing folded and put away 6 months prior to the referral. You go in and rearrange, pretend you’re holding the child while you rock.

You may begin to eat to calm your nerves, especially M & Ms, which seem to be particularly soothing. (chips for me!)

What to do:

Continue the useful projects you started when the symptoms of WFRS were in the mild stage. You may have to make a conscious choice to limit the amount of time you spend on said projects.
Be sure to get to bed at a reasonable hour each night. Make a habit of preparing healthy meals for you and your family. Make these daily routines.

Limit the amount of time you are online reading posts and sending emails related to adoption, waiting, referral rumors, etc. (really??)

Don’t purchase M & Ms (or chips), except for the occasional small single serving bag. Key word is “occasional” – which means perhaps once every two weeks.

Severe “Waiting-for-Referral Syndrome”

WARNING: Symptoms of severe WFRS can be debilitating. You should be on alert for these symptoms. You may need to seek help by relying on a good friend to hold you accountable for your daily activity.

On your days off (or if you work at home), you wake up at zero-dark-thirty, stumble to the computer, log in to read the latest posts to see if any new rumors have been started.

The sun rises, the family gets up – you are “in the zone” reading through the hundreds of emails from across the world, and you are still in your PJs. You just can’t tear yourself away, for fear a news flash would be posted saying that referrals are on their way for the next two months’ worth of dossiers! Your family rolls their eyes and goes on about their business, hoping that you will snap out of it and live life again.

Your every waking thought is about the referral: when will it come, when will you get the call, do I have my camera ready to take photos, and so on.

Your work suffers because you cannot focus on your professional responsibilities.

What to do:

Remind yourself that this process is something you cannot control. Breathe deeply and focus on the here and now.

Force yourself to wait to check the adoption group email postings until your family has gotten up and you’ve all had breakfast together.

Allow yourself one hour in the morning, and one hour in the evening – MAX (preferably less) to read the adoption group communication.

Go for a date with your spouse. Talk about the weather, current events, football scores – anything other than the latest referral rumor. Remember, once you have that new little one in your home, it’ll be much harder to have that precious time with your honey.

Allow yourself a window of time each day to daydream, journal, pray, think about, and talk about your anxiety over the adoption referral. This will then allow your mind to be free to concentrate on your other responsibilities. By setting aside this special, reserved time each day tell yourself that you can then get back to focusing on the rest of your life and your family, because you’ll have another “special, reserved time” tomorrow.

In summary - keep in mind that all this waiting will be well worth it when they place that little child in your arms. The more you are able to care for yourself during the wait for your referral, the better parent you will be from day one.

CAN ANYONE RELATE???

18 more X's . . . .

. . . . . and 18 days closer to our little one.

Thank you CCAA!

Wow, who would have thought you'd be reading my blog and would listen to little ol me? I woke up this morning and saw that you had updated your website just as I had requested. AND you matched more than just a week. You matched 18 days worth of LID's. That's actually way more than I even expected. It's been a long time since that many days have been matched in one month. Hooray CCAA - keep up the hard work.

Oh, and one more request . . . . do you think you could match 29 days next month so that Sept. 7 is included in referrals? You'd make our family so very happy - then we'd get to see our little one's face for the first time and no more waiting. Thanks.

Good Night CCAA

It's Sunday night and I just want you to know that I'll be going to bed soon. I know you are 12 hours ahead of us and that means you are just starting your work day. As I sleep, please continue to work on that pile of dossiers. I'd love to wake up to some really, really good news. Perhaps referrals for at least two weeks worth of LID's (I'm not really asking for that much). Please put smiles on the faces of all of us Mommy's and Daddy's in waiting. I will be checking your website soon after I awaken in the morning so I would appreciate it if you could please update it so we can celebrate some good news. Thank you. :)

Okay I lied . . . but this is just too crazy not to post (sorry)

Not just one . . .




TWO!!!!! Check it out. That has to be a good sign.

Last post about ladybugs - I promise (for now)

I know nobody wants to hear about another ladybug sighting but I have to share this one. My mother-in-law came to stay with us for a few days and surprised me with a charm for my italian charm bracelet. It's a ladybug! Thanks Peggy. It's so cute - I just love it. So technically that's the third ladybug I've seen in the last week or so. That's gotta mean something.




CCAA should be letting us know about referrals for this month in the next week or so. Let's hope they at least finish all of July and perhaps even get partway into August. We're starting to exercise our fingers so they'll be in shape to cross off all those days on our countdown calendar. I'll keep you posted. :)

Could it be? A real ladybug this time?

This afternoon I was outside cutting the lawn and I had just turned the lawnmower off when I heard Victoria calling me over. She was so excited and yelling, "A ladybug, a ladybug!" So of course I went over to take a look and sure enough - a real live ladybug was crawling all over her sweater! I couldn't believe it. That totally makes up for the false ladybug sighting yesterday doesn't it? As for our referral . . . well, I'll say no more. Here are the pictures I tried to take - very blurry I know but honestly it's a real ladybug. Victoria and Austin are my witnesses!

Ladybug Sighting!

Can you believe it? I spotted a ladybug! Does that mean our referral is coming soon? That's what it means doesn't it?

Ok, ok . . . the ladybug I spotted was on these funky cool napkins my mom gave me today. She saw them at a store and just had to get them for me. Neat eh? They're the kind of napkins though that are so cute you almost don't want to use them. Perhaps they should be saved for a referral party. Come on CCAA - bring on those referrals!!!

Sunday Afternoon

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Just thought I'd share a few pictures of how we spent Sunday afternoon. It was a great family day - can't wait till there's one more little one to join us though! :)

One year ago today . . .

. . . our file was logged in at the CCAA.

Wow! At the beginning of this journey we didn't think we'd be celebrating such a day. A 12-month anniversary of being logged in didn't even exist. We thought we'd be to China and back for a few months already at this point. Anyway, things change and here we are. We're a lot closer than we were a year ago and that's the only way to look at it.

Our agency is telling us that the wait may increase to 16 - 18 months from LID. So if that's the case, we may not get to see our little one's face until January or March. That will be two whole years since we began this whole process. I know it will all be worth it in the end.

We have been so blessed over the past year (and more) by the support of family and friends. We know there are so many people out there praying for us and our little one. Also getting to know our travel group (Group #244) has been amazing and a great support as we encourage each other and go through each step together. Thank you everyone!

Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we come closer to the day we see the face of our little one for the first time and then eventually hold him/her in our arms.

I Love You Like Crazy Cakes

A couple at church surprised us on Sunday with this great book. It will be an awesome way to help explain to our little one how he/she came to be part of our family and how he/she grew in our hearts before we even met him/her.

Here's what the publisher says about the book:

"Based on the author's own experience, this heartfelt story follows a woman on her journey to China to adopt a baby girl from China. From paperwork to plane flight, the narrative chronicles the baby's trip from a crib in a big room shared with many other babies to her own crib in her own room in her new home."

What a thoughtful gift! Thank you Steve and Agnes!

Monthly Countdown Ritual

Well, I know after a while these pictures will get kind of boring but it's just something we gotta do. The CCAA updated their website and so now it's official that referrals were sent out for LID's up to and including July 22, 2005. That's only nine days this time around but it's nine days closer to our LID so every little bit is good. It's better than nothing. So once again here are the kids crossing off dates on our countdown chart.

More referrals sent by CCAA

Well it's not exactly official until the CCAA updates their website but the word out there is that referrals this month are only including LID's up to July 22. That's only nine days covered this month. It's quite disappointing that it's taking forever to get through July but again, there's nothing we can do about it.

Every Friday we receive a weekly update from our agency. Often there's really not a lot of news in it, especially lately with all the delays in referral times. However, this week I really appreciated one of the paragraphs. Here's what it said:

"To be certain, extended timelines and changes to adoption program requirements can be very stressful for families. We all sometimes need to be reminded that international adoption is about providing families for children, not finding children for families. When children are unable to remain in their birth families or to be adopted domestically, international adoption provides a final option for children to be placed with a family. As an agency, our goal is to “make families happen for children”. "

I thought this was a great reminder for everyone - especially myself - to keep focused on the real reason international adoption even exists. It's all about the children. We are blessed to be able to provide a loving home for these children and whatever the time frame is, so be it.

More X's on the Countdown Chart

15 is better than nothing right? Victoria and Austin crossed off the 15 days worth of LID's that the CCAA sent referrals for. The numbers keep increasing. April was 7 days, May was 9 days, June was 13 days and July was 15 days. So at least the number of days is going up and not down. Can't wait to see how many are included in next month's referrals.

The CCAA only has to match 56 more LID's to get to ours - September 7!!! They can do that in August can't they? They can go from matching 15 days to 56 right? Ok, I know I'm dreaming but I'll be brought back to reality soon enough - so let me dream!

Disappointing News

I've been waiting and waiting to post this because technically it's not official until the CCAA posts it on their website; however, that doesn't seem to be happening. I suppose with the CCAA moving their office, perhaps they don't have all their computers up and running - we'll give them the benefit of the doubt. So here it is anyway. The CCAA has sent referrals this month for people with LID's up to July 13. We were hoping it was going to be the whole month of July. Now it looks as if they're only sending out two weeks at a time. If that's the case, we can expect our referral in November with travel in January. Too bad - we were totally hoping to have our little one in our arms before Christmas but that may not be the case. I suppose we can still hope and pray that it happens sooner but it doesn't look like it. Anyways, that's the news for now - we'll keep you posted.

Scrapbook Pages to go along with 100 Good Wishes Quilt

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More Fabric

Ok, here is some more material we've received for the quilt. I am still waiting for just a few more squares and then the real sewing can begin. I have most of the pieces that go in between the squares cut out too and I actually have started sewing a little bit. I don't want to do too much until I have all the pieces so I can lay them all out and see the final outcome. That way I can still move things around so it's just right.

To tell the truth, I've been a little attached to the computer the last few days. I am anxiously waiting to see how many referrals the CCAA will be sending out this month. We usually find out around this time of the month. I think this month will tell us a lot about the timing of our referral. If the CCAA sends out referrals for the whole month of July, that means the wait is still at 12 months and there's hope that we'll get our referral perhaps in September and travel in November/December. So please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. We'll keep you posted.

Quilt Pieces

I just thought I'd post pictures of some of the fabric we've received for the 100 Good Wishes Quilt. I took these pictures a while back so if you've sent me a piece of fabric and it's not on these pictures, it's just because I didn't have it when these pictures were taken. We've received so many beautiful pieces of material and each one is unique. The words that have been written with each piece mean so much to us and I'm sure when our little one gets big enough to understand what went into this quilt, she/he too will cherish it. Thanks to everyone who has contributed. We are blessed by each of you.

Countdown to Baby

Victoria, Austin and I have created a countdown calendar. Out came the scissors, glue, markers and rubber stamps. Victoria wrote out the months and they both decorated them with stamps. It's hanging where we can see it all the time and can cross off the days with x's.

Ok, here's how it works. There's a calendar for June, July, August and September 2005. We're counting down LID's (log in dates) until the CCAA (China Centre of Adoption Affairs) gets to ours, which is September 7, 2005. For example, in the month of May the CCAA sent out referrals for all the families who were logged in between June 7 -15, 2005. So those are the days we crossed off. Then just last week the CCAA sent out referrals for all those families who were logged in June 16 - 28, 2005 so those days were crossed off. It's usually near the end of the month when we hear from the CCAA about how many days worth of LID's they'll be sending referrals for. So we shall wait until the end of July to cross of some more days - hopefully a whole month's worth! (that's the rumour anyway.)